DVD: Supergator

Ever wonder what happened to Kelly McGillis? Well you can find her among the cast of this TV creature feature from B-movie king Roger Corman. In fact she may be the most frightening thing in this film. Considering she played Tom Cruise’s love interest in Top Gun, it’s a jaw-dropping revelation to see how aged she is. She now looks almost old enough to play the eternally youthful star’s mother. But I digress.

After the obligatory Jaws-style opening we meet the cast, most of whom will be eventually digested by the titular creature; a genetically-engineered alligator. The square-jawed hero and the intrepid female reporter at his side lead this ensemble and follow closely in the tradition of 1950s sci-fi. It’s an entertaining adherence to cliché that endears fans to films like this. Of course there’s always a preliminary narrative excuse to bring man and beast together. In this case it’s an expedition to a Hawaiian island by scientists hoping to predict a volcanic eruption. We have to put up with this charade for longer than is necessary but as the half hour rule designates, the Supergator soon starts to make its presence felt.

Much of the first half hour is taken up with pointless exposition about the noble expedition and the introduction of the rest of the ensemble. Some time is also wasted watching a couple of girls jump around in bikinis. Then it’s down to business, time for the computer generated creature to leap out of the water and pursue the bimbos. One makes a weak effort to defend herself with a stick.

Two more pretty girls (one of whom is seen drinking Gatorade) and some young dudes are then introduced to further highlight how weak the story and script are. Padding out the screen time and upping the body count, which is after all what is important in a film like this. We also get Professor McGillis explaining why she’s cloned the Supergator. To be honest, it’s hard to pay attention to the dialogue.

Every once in a while the second of the bikini girls is seen running around. The director obviously can’t get enough of this big breasted beauty as we cut back to see her almost as frequently as the monster during this second act. She crosses paths first with the female tourists in short shorts, who fails to heed her warnings, and eventually with one of the other unnecessary characters. He prolongs her life purely to add a few more sexy shots between the scenes of carnage. This pink bikini girl must go down in history as one of the most pointless movie characters ever.

It soon becomes apparent that this is going to be one of those films where the main characters and their ultimate nemesis will not encounter each other until the final act. You wait and wait for the scientists to come face to face with the resurrected creature and we get scene after scene of bogus plotting. Nobody cares about their quest, it’s the gator we paid to see, and with the sex appeal digested the film enters a lull. After a handful of unremarkable kills, all shot in close-up or taking place off screen, we finally get to the main course as the Supergator threatens the volcanologists.

55 minutes in and it’s a race against time. With the volcano ready to explode and the Supergator ready for dinner our intrepid heroes go their separate ways to pad out the running time even more. The local resort is under threat now. “Lava flow and a monster killer gator headed their way, they won’t believe it!” says the hunter of the group. But while momentarily amusing in dialogue like this, the dual threat – a common feature of the monster movie – fails to satisfy as it’s only ever a distraction. Experience has taught us that we won’t be seeing this second threat realised and sure enough soon it’s disregarded completely as we move to a lengthy and action-packed conclusion.

Roger Corman is the king of exploitation. He reused dinosaur puppets from Carnosaur to make two sequels and then recycled the monster footage from those films to make yet another feature, Raptor. With this in mind it should come as no surprise that this film is merely an extension of an earlier flick of his called DinoCroc. Corman’s thinking is that if you’ve created the design of a creature for one film why not tweak it for a few more dollars to crank out another movie?

Never one to buck a trend, Corman has contributed his fair share of shelf and schedule fillers. The proliferation of CGI creature features in recent years came about as a direct result of films like Jurassic Park and they all follow a basic slasher movie formula. DinoCroc, SuperCroc (unrelated), Crocodile, Frankenfish, Curse of the Komodo, Lake Placid 2 et al each exploit the novelty value of their titles and offer viewers little else.

In this film there are plenty of scenes of computer-enhanced carnage and puppet mauling in close up, so those that like this kind of thing certainly get their money’s worth. Supergator is among the best of this low-brow subgenre thanks to the amusing pink bikini girl, the sheer number of gratuitous kills and the action-packed finale.     Richard Hawes

DVD: Black Xmas

Glen Morgan seems to have a penchant for remaking forgotten 1970s horror films. Such may be his undoing if he ever wants to break out as a director after this second failure.
Folowing up 2003’s flop Willard (worth a look) with a retread of Bob Clark’s 1974 proto-slasher Black Christmas must have seemed like a pretty safe bet. The concept is certainly far more commercial. But the result is a far more confused than his skillfully macabre debut.

This seasonal slasher set in a sorority house has all the gloss and gore conventionally required of Hollywood horror pictures these days but none of the charm. It also shifts uncomfortably between laughs and scares. Unlike the Final Destination films which Morgan wrote, the humour of Black Christmas seems entirely misplaced. You’re never quite sure which parts you should be laughing at, and this has less to do with ambiguity than poor filmmaking.

An attempt at marrying dark, tense scenes with extreme, cartoon violence is established in the opening sequence and it just doesn’t work. And you find yourself longing for the consistency of the aesthetically focused When a Stranger Calls remake. As terrible as that was it at least had consistency.

On the ‘making of’ documentary Morgan goes on record as saying that he added shock scenes, the kind he personally dislikes, because it’s demanded by the audience. Is it any wonder then that the film seems so messy when he’s making choices against his own instincts? The failure of Willard has made him cautious and that is the greatest tragedy of that unfairly overlooked film.

This DVD has lots to offer the genre cinephile. Alternate and deleted scenes enhance the documentary footage to further enlighten as to the indecision that is the heart of the problem with this film. There is even the option of viewing the film with the US theatrical ending.

In conclusion it has to be said that Black Christmas, which features an almost exclusively female cast, including one of the stars of the first film, is an interesting failure. Check out Willard instead. Richard Hawes

Interested? Black Christmas can be found here. Alternatively, give Willard a go instead.

CINEMA: Eastern Promises

Although not all of David Cronenberg’s films are entirely successful, he does choose subjects that really make you think. In his last film, A History Of Violence, he explored the relationship between masculinity and exactly that – violence. Eastern Promises acts as a companion piece to that movie, not only because they both star Viggo Mortensen, but also because violence, and more importantly men and violence, are put under the microscope once more.

In a cold, grey London Anna (Naomi Watts) acts a midwife at a large NHS hospital. When a young, heavily pregnant Russian teenager is admitted and subsequently dies, Anna feels a wave of pity for the baby she leaves orphaned. Using the girl’s diary Anna traces her back to the restaurant where she used to work for Russian émigré Semyon (Armin Mueller-Stahl) and his son Kirill (Vincent Cassel). Here she meets their chauffeur Nikolai (Mortensen) who warns her to leave well alone. But Anna feels obliged to keep searching for someone who will claim the baby as family, but the more she digs the more she unearths about the Russian Mafia, dubious business deals and people trafficking. Although attracted to Nikolai she knows getting any closer could put her life, and the lives of her family, into terrible jeopardy.

With London now home to more of Russia’s oligarchs than Moscow this is a timely, utterly chilling and thrilling film, unwrapping and revealing to the audience a shadowy world most of us never knew existed. This glimpse into the closed Russian community is absolutely intriguing, made even more so here with the spicy whiff of added danger and violence (there’s no getting away from that word in this film). In fact, the whole film is imbued with a sense of threat, both implied and real, and the pivotal scene in the film is a brutal, bare-knuckle (and bare everything else) fight in a Turkish bath.

Here, Viggo Mortensen shows there’s so much more to him than Lord Of The Rings as he gives a performance of sinewy strength and real courage. Although Naomi Watts is also strong, her role is slightly more passive and it is Mortensen who exudes danger from every pore. This is gripping, if viscerally violent stuff, but Cronenberg injects just enough dark, morbid humour into proceedings to keep viewers on his side.     Dee Pilgrim

CINEMA: Sicko

Love him or hate him, you have to admit Michael Moore has changed the face of the film documentary forever. His love and appetite for sticking it to the big boys – be they the gun lobby or the American government – can become infectious and his newest tirade is gripping stuff. Welcome to the sorry state of health care in the USA. Yes, I did say USA, because although we may whinge about our much put-upon National Health Service, compared to what happens in the States we here in Britain are laughing all the way to the operating theatre.

Moore’s basic point is that in the wealthiest nation on earth (the USA) there is no national health system – you have to have health insurance, which millions of people can’t afford. When these people get ill they are faced with huge treatment bills and for some who can’t pay that can mean no treatment and death.

In order to make the point that a national health system would be more than affordable in the States he travels to Canada, England, France and finally Cuba (all countries where treatment is free) to see how they do it. Along the way he meets up with a bunch of emergency workers and volunteers who helped clear Ground Zero after 9/11 and now have serious health problems from the noxious smoke they inhaled. Their plight proves to be the most affecting thing in the film.

Yes, you will get angry and sad while watching the film, however you may also feel slightly irritated at how Moore manipulates the data so you only get to see his side of the story.  That said, this is highly entertaining and although it probably won’t change things in the States it does leave you feeling slightly smug that we here in Britain have the NHS.     Dee Pilgrim

CINEMA: Rendition

So, Mr Bush, you say the USA doesn’t condone torture? As far as this film is concerned it not only does so, but it also ‘facilitates’ it by flying terrorist suspects to countries where torture is seen as a legitimate part of interrogation.

After a business trip to South Africam Egyptian-born Anwar El-Ibrahimi (Omar Metwally) fails to make it back on his return flight. His heavily pregnant wife Isabella (Reese Witherspoon), is bewildered by his disappearance and enlists the help of an old friend (Peter Sarsgaard) in a US senator’s office to find out what has happened to him. As they investigate his phone records and credit card receipts they realise Anwar is a victim of extraordinary rendition – he has secretly been flown to an unspecified African country to be interrogated about terrorist atrocities, including suicide bombings. Although the torture is carried out by a local secret police officer (Yigor Naor), it is monitored by CIA agent Doug Freeman (Jake Gyllenhaal) who slowly comes to the conclusion Anwar’s is a case of mistaken identity.

Rendition would have been a better film if the plot had concentrated more tightly on one set of main characters rather than involving a series of sub-plots (it’s actually three stories rolled into one – Anwar and Isabella’s, Doug’s, and also the secret policeman and his daughter and her boyfriend). It also employs a superfluous time-loop device that doesn’t push the story forward. However, it is very well acted, especially by Witherspoon and Metwally, and there’s a great cameo from Meryl Streep as the CIA boss bitch from hell. The torture scenes are disturbing and difficult to watch, but the film lacks passion and so you never feel as angry as the subject matter should make you. This lack of involvement with what is going on detracts from what is otherwise a worthy take on a reprehensible practise.     Dee Pilgrim

CINEMA: Princess

Shot mainly as an animated cartoon, with a smattering of real life scenes, Princess surprisingly takes the porn trade as its subject matter and it certainly doesn’t pull its punches. The Princess of the title is a drug-addicted porn star making films and a fortune for her producer boyfriend. When the drugs finally kill her it is left to her clergyman brother August to bring up her five-year-old daughter Mia.

Mia is knowing well beyond her years and fearing she may live to share the same fate as her mother, August decides to destroy the industry that exploited Princess, thereby avenging her death.

Although it is nicely made with a well-worked plot and characters, this unremittingly downbeat film makes for depressing viewing and will probably only make an impact on the festival circuit. Dee Pilgrim

CINEMA: Razzle Dazzle – A Journey Into Dance

Christopher Guest has almost cornered the market in spoof documentaries, but this little Aussie curiosity has managed to slip through and although it’s no match for the likes of Best In Show, it has its moments.

This is really a Strictly Ballroom for pre-pubescent girls with a bunch of no-hopers aspiring to go to the finals of one of Australia’s numerous dance competitions. On one hand we have the young ladies from Miss Elizabeth’s (Jane Hall) troupe – all discipline and diets – and on the other the rabble that is Mr Jonathon’s (Ben Miller) Jazzketeers – all pre-teen rivalries, pushy mothers and homemade costumes.

There’s also the question of Mr Jonathon’s novel approach to choreography; all his routines have to be based on social or ethical issues. When the troupe wins a bye into the Grand Final (echoes of Little Miss Sunshine there, another film this resembles) he chooses to create a dance based on the plight of women in Afghanistan.

Much of the film is shot as either straight documentary footage of the girls rehearsing, or the main characters talking straight to camera, and in the scenes where this works well it’s very entertaining, but much of it suffers from a certain self-consciousness that dampens its youthful charm. Britain’s own Ben Miller is a real star though and watch out for cameos from Paul Mercurio and a rather baffled looking Leo Sayer.     Dee Pilgrim

CINEMA: Stardust

Once upon a time Neil Gaiman wrote a fairy story for adults that turned out to be great fun for big and little kids alike. That tale is Stardust and in the hands of director Matthew (Layer Cake) Vaughn it has become a charming movie with a huge heart and plenty of feelgood factor. It doesn’t hurt that it also has more humour then you might expect, a very dark edge and some stunning special effects.

Our hero is young Tristan who lives in the village of Edge and is smitten with local beauty Victoria (Sienna Miller). In order to win her heart he promises to travel into the forbidden magic kingdom of Stormhold and retrieve a star that has fallen to earth, which is where his plan falls down because the star isn’t an inanimate object but a living and rather grumpy woman (Claire Danes). It doesn’t help that the king’s murderous sons also want to get their hands on the star, as does a trio of hag witches (led by a wonderfully nasty Michelle Pfeiffer) who will use her life-force to rejuvenate themselves.

 

All of this leads to what is basically a romantic chase film – but one with weird and wacky characters and happenings galore (including a goat turned into a man, a boy turned into a mouse, and the ghosts of princes past chatting about their still living brothers). Best of all is the Sky Captain (Robert De Niro) who drifts among the clouds on his pirate ship catching lightning and exploring his feminine side in his downtime.

The film’s imagination and scope lead to some stunning set pieces, including an explosive climax, and (of course) this being a fairy tale it’d be wrong to assume that it doesn’t end happily ever after.

If you are looking for a family film that really delivers, or if you’re just a big kid who likes magic spells and a bit of adventure, then the charming Stardust will definitely put a smile on your face.     Dee Pilgrim

CINEMA: Once

When a little film is universally praised, it is with some distance that it should be anticipated, otherwise buzz and expectation outstrip the end product. Once is this year’s Lost in Translation, Garden State, Napoleon Dynamite, Little Miss Sunshine, etc – all quality films that touch the heart but hardly reinvent the wheel. As the almost inevitable hype hits Once remember that.

Anyone who doesn’t like their romances schmaltzy will find this very moving; even more so perhaps because so few movies hit the mark. They are usually so weighed down by sentimentality and formulaic plotting that the trailer signposts everything you will find out in the hour-and-a-half. Here, the low budget, DIY-feel helps an audience question a happy ending, and that lack of guarantee makes you invest all the more in the burgeoning attachment of a busker/vacuum repairman and Big Issue seller/cleaner (whose names you intriguingly never find out). Their chemistry is palpable. The glue that binds them is music. Both write and play and find that they reinvigorate each others’ slightly bruised souls.

What is striking about Once is not only the longing tone hits just right, but that it all feels so captivating; and the leads Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova, who are talented singers and lyricists, give believable performances despite being non-professional actors. If you are lucky enough to catch Hansard and Irglova perform together, seize it, as live, in an intimate surrounding, they are exhilarating.

Having now seen Once twice the charm of this uplifting film is all the more evident.     Hemanth Kissoon

COMPETITION: Stardust

Stardust (cert PG), the latest fantasy-filled release from Paramount Pictures UK is at cinemas everywhere from October 19. To celebrate its release we are offering you the chance to win some exclusive Stardust goodies.

Stardust, based on the best-selling graphic novel by Neil Gaiman and Charles Vess, takes audiences on an adventure that begins in a village in England and ends up in places that exist in an imaginary world. A young man named Tristan (Charlie Cox) tries to win the heart of Victoria (Sienna Miller), the beautiful but cold object of his desire, by going on a quest to retrieve a fallen star. His journey takes him to a mysterious and forbidden land beyond the walls of his village. On his odyssey, Tristan finds the star, which has transformed into a striking girl named Yvaine (Claire Danes).

However, Tristan is not the only one seeking the star. A king’s (Peter O’Toole) four living sons – not to mention the ghosts of their three dead brothers – all need the star as they vie for the throne. Tristan must also overcome the evil witch, Lamia (Michelle Pfeiffer), who needs the star to make her young again. As Tristan battles to survive these threats, encountering a pirate named Captain Shakespeare (Robert De Niro) and a shady trader named Ferdy the Fence (Ricky Gervais) along the way, his quest changes. He must now win the heart of the star for himself as he discovers the meaning of true love.

Stardust (cert PG) is at cinemas everywhere from October 19. Find out more about the film and its fantastic cast here.

To celebrate this magical movie, we are offering you an exclusive chance win Stardust goodies. Your prize will include a dressing gown, notebook, candle and soundtrack to the film. We are also giving away a copy of the book by Neil Gaiman.

For your chance to win simply answer the following question…

Artist Dave McKean worked alongside Neil Gaiman on which series of books?

Send your answers to competitions@the-void.co.uk by November 19

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